Hi, kids! It's me, your pal, None Hitwonder, taking this opportunity to catch up on my fan mail. Even as a Hitwonder it's really hard to read all the tons of mail I get. Here is a happy letter from someone just about YOUR age:
Dear you, wonderful, fabulous, magnificent, exquisite None Hitwonder, A cold chill runs up my spine every time I see you sock a villain, and, oh, how I cry when you're even scratched. Please, don't send me a mimeograph copy of interesting facts about you; I want YOUR handwriting. I have a whole wall on my room dedicated to you.
Oh, None Hitwonder, I'm making a gum wrapper chain to symbolize my love for you. It's going to be as long as I am tall, and I'm 5 foot 10 inches in stocking feet. Please, None Hitwonder, PLEASE, come next Saturday and sleep for a week or two. I will feed you breakfast in bed, I will make your bed for you, and I like you so much that I want you to spend the whole summer with me.
(I hope you know this is a girl writing)